What's in my purse

Give ALL the music and sweet tea to me.
No, I'm not about to double check for mistakes. My favorite episode of Extreme Home Makeover is re-airing on CMT. 

This is my Wednesday : "I ain't got nothin', so I shall post a pic of things in my purse, while relying on my humor to get me through" (Yes I know that made no sense. Ask me if I care. Chances are I have none to give.)

So I saw Beth posted this and I loved it. Don't ask me when she posted it cause I've slept and drank sweet tea since then. That led me to mrsadventureofamisplacedbelle. Stalkin' commenced. Yeah, I gotta learn her name. Is it rude of me to be like, "Hey girl, I'm tired of stalkin' what's yo name?" (Yeah, I think it makes me sound like one of those creepers you meet late at night walkin' across campus to get food, too!)

So let's get onto the junk I carry. I go through a few different purses but my go to purse is this Coach Crossbody. I'm talkin' 2010 old. (But I'll bless a haters heart right back in a second if I catch them hatin' on this old season bag. Isn't that why we swear we need the expensive bag in the first place... Because it will last FOREVER.)


Obviously y'all can see the picture but allow me to explain. This ish ain't twitter and I dang sure gotta use more than 140 characters. Y'all know that website was not made for Southern women. What Southern woman do you know that tells a story that quick. (Momma says never call someone a liar but that ho be lyin if she can... Sorry Momma.)

Bottom left. Yes, that's what my girl be lookin' like when I open her.

On the right is my keychain wallet nonsense. YES, I need all that for the two keys I carry. Didn't I tell ya. The wallet just has the usual. To bad I couldn't make it rain 100's, 50's or 20's... hell I wish I could make it rain dollars. *Checks the calender.  I don't get paid till next Friday.. insert awkward emoji that only Iphone users can see*

Top Right:
Y'all lucky I didn't add the dust and junk.
*Pause... how y'all doin' on the humor factor. Y'all still with me?*
*Play*
  • Yes, that white blob is random papers/recipts that I just throw in my bag. Hey, y'all didn't say front. I'm showin' y'all what I ACTUALLY carry.
  • Obviously I need my glasses. Cue the funky lookin' black blob
  • My Lilly Planner. Do I really need to explain that one?
  • An umbrella. For the life of  me I can't figure out why I carry that one. We don't get rain often around here. I think I carry it just so I can sing Luke Bryan's 'Rain is a Good Thing' while pretending he doesn't have a wife and kids and is really shakin' it for me. 
  • Under Lilly Planner: Random movie coupon
  • Yes, I need all those writin' things
  • Alieve is baby Jesus in pill form
  • Contact solution (I know y'all didn't think I used my spit. That ish be nasty)
  • Random ball I took up from a kid at work
  • Eos chapsticks, Eos hand lotion and another random chapstick. Yes, I know chapstick is the brand.
  • Purple contact case. Girl, I gotta see
  • My Vouges and fakes Ray Bans. It's ok I can get away with it cause my 'real glasses are Ray Bans' if that doesn't work then I can just bust out the sob story of how the fake Ray Bans were my Daddy's and they help me stay connected to him.(I know awful but ask me if I care.)
  • I can make it rain change
  • Clear finger nail polish
  • Factory Iphone earphones
  • That huge blurry pink thing is a double mirror
  • The silver keychain my God Mother gave it to me the other day when she came back from her cruise. She got it in the Holy Land (No not Africa.. That's the Motherland)
  • Those rings students gave me. Pretty sure they cam off cupcakes. Y'all know what that means. Some Kindergartner licked on them. If they thought I was wearin' that then they dumbmer than a four year old who tries to hold their pee. I don't have the heart to throw them away. 
  • Random creams/eye drops the doc gave me like a year ago when one of them trifilin kids gave me pink eye and wing worm. Let me tell ya. That same day he spilled my can of sweet tea. Y'all I was almost on the 6 o'clock news. (Obvs I wasn't since I'm sittin here writin' this post)
  • You can't see the bobby pin but trust me it's there.
That's all y'all.

Come back tomorrow where I link to the Pinterest nonsense and debate if it's ok to post two recipes in a week if I'm linking them to something I got off Pinterest. 


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1 comment

  1. laughing. as usual.
    *pause*
    *play*
    love it!
    you gotta lotta ish in that bag. you gone need a chiro.

    ReplyDelete

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